What is this thing called Love?

Walking to work this morning I was listening to Jazz FM on my phone and a couple of my favourite songs (I have many) Someone Like you by Van Morrison and Sweet Love by Anita Baker were played. Well I am a sucker for a romantic tune and if I were to list my favourite songs I would estimate that 95% of them would be love songs.

Being a mother of daughters I often think of the agonies and ecstasies of love that they may experience; it is too easy for me to start a conversation ‘When I was your age…….’ or ‘I used to fancy a bloke who….’ to try to empathise or ‘be helpful’. However the look on their faces says it all ‘Oh here she goes again….what does she know……etc’.

But I do know, or at least I think I know, what they are going through. But am I really qualified to give advice when I look back at those experiences? I have certainly experienced the highs and lows of being in love and each time it was very different as I grew, matured(!) and understood what I wanted from life.

My first love was tall, dark and handsome. We met when I was 15, at a local youth club. He was 17 and had a car. The height of sophistication. There followed a very long relationship which included getting engaged. All was not well however, we were way too young, both he and I grew up and apart from each other and in that time there was some heartbreak in between the fun. It took us years to realise we needed to part and I forced that by moving away from the area, it was totally the right thing to do and there has never been even a second of regret….for me. I saw him about 10 years ago and spoke to him and that tall, dark, handsome man had morphed into something very different.

My next big love was my first husband. He was tall (ish), fair and very different from love no.1. Life was full of exciting holidays, good food and wine, luxuries. We had been introduced by my best friend and within a few months we were engaged and shortly afterwards married. We went on to have our wonderful children, complete and utter joys of my life.

Love was not to last however and we parted ways.

Then someone came back into my life, someone I had known since I was 16. He was now divorced and I was seperated and BANG, there it was again. I was back to feeling like a teenager. We have been together now for longer than either of my first 2 loves and been married for 7 years. Life has brought us many challenges since we have been together, but after each one I realise that there is no one else that I would have wanted to face those challenges with.

I don’t know what life has in store for us, I just know that I am enjoying what I have and I can only hope that our children are lucky enough to have the same experience in their life and find someone that songs like Someone like you and Sweet Love makes them smile as they think of them whilst walking on a bitterly cold and windy day.


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